Contracting a difficult-to-diagnose autoimmune disease

Becoming so addicted to my mascara that I refuse to be seen without it

Being mesmerized by the headlights of oncoming cars at night and, like a moth to the flame, driving into them

Bedsores

Being wrongfully convicted of a serious crime

Getting engaged to someone I later realize I don't want to be engaged to and then having to break it off way too close to the wedding date

Contracting any type of worm or parasite that comes out of your anus

Being videotaped expressing a dumb opinion after being stopped on the street and then seeing it aired on the local evening news